Always Been You

~Lola~

When he dropped his face near mine, I experienced shivers in my stomach, and my breath stuck in the back of my throat. When his mouth came into contact with mine, the heat was immediately unleashed. I found bliss as his tongue glided between my lips. My heart raced against the inside of my ribcage, and tremors formed over my skin. Bumblebees flitted over my gut like crazy. My entire being sensed his penetration. His kiss set the blaze ablaze. My body was passionate in ways I’ll never understand. Our chemistry is unmistakable. His hands moved in circles against my clit. I groaned aloud. I was floating on cloud nine. I wished to have him inside of me.

“Dante, please!” I pleaded.

Then something stung me, and I screamed,

“Dante!”

I woke up like a zombie. I examined my surroundings just to come face-to-face with my mother. She was tapping her foot against the floor with one of her legs.

“It’s a dream, isn’t it? Why would Mother be here?” I burst out laughing like a crazy woman. After that, I could hear her talking.

“Are you done?”

I angled my face in her direction and rubbed my eyes with both of my hands. I must be dreaming.

Is it possible that Dante has tracked me down? No, no, no, he can’t find me.

“Did you think you could run away from me, Lola?”

“Mother!”

I sprung from my bed and hugged her. It’s been awful for the last three months. It was all about me going to my flower shop and returning home. I opted to keep a low profile, not establishing any business that might bring me into contact with Dante. Yes, he is the love of my life. She grinned as she glanced at me again. I had completely forgotten that her finding me meant Dante would find me. Then reality strikes. I dashed into the closet and began packing.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Dante is the last person I want to see. I can’t see him.” I said in between pants. I was barely able to speak without being suffocated by my own breath.

“Lola!” I wanted to flee when she yelled. “Lola!” she yelled once more, her two hands clasping my shoulders. “Look at me. What happened to the mother-daughter bond of trust? Do you have second thoughts about believing me?” I dropped my luggage on the floor after she shook me. I began sobbing like a scared little kitten.

“I don’t know what to do,” I told her as I continued to cry.

I collapsed to the floor, and she did the same. As we were all on the floor with me sobbing, she continued to pet my back. I’m not sure if it’s the pregnancy, but I’ve been an emotional bitch lately. Matthew always sends me home from work. He is a man in his forties with a family. He’s always there to listen to me and console me when I unexpectedly weep. If you ask me, I have no idea. In the last few months, I have been crying all the time. I almost pushed Mason and June away. I dabbed away my tears. She brushed my hair back and wedged it behind my ear. She cupped my face in her two hands and kissed the bridge of my nose. She continued wiping away my tears. Afterward, she helped me to my feet and seated me on the edge of the bed while she sat next to me.

“Dante doesn’t know anything, and I was careful enough when tracking you down. I knew exactly where you were going the week you departed. It only took me some time to figure out where in Ozark you were. Although it is a small town, I was unaware you were so close. I was purchasing flowers yesterday and noticed your photograph in the shop. I asked a gentleman named Matthew if that was Lola, and he confirmed it. After three hours, I saw someone driving a car that was registered in your name, and I followed the car, which led me here to you. Then I went into the hotel to retrieve my belongings. Perhaps you were too exhausted, but your door was unlocked, and therefore I assisted myself and rested.”

“Is Dante all right?” She sighed as she stared at me.Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.

“Why didn’t you tell him?”

“He told me that we could never be together and that he was already with Candice. Informing him of my pregnancy would only exacerbate the situation. I didn’t want him to think I was using the pregnancy to be with him instead of the one he loved, Candice. I considered abortion, but the last time I visited Emily, she told me that they were three. I couldn’t abort them. I knew immediately that I needed to protect them from Dante and Candice.”

“To be honest, if you ask me, you made the correct decision. Both of them are unworthy of you. And drama is something you should avoid. I was certain that you and Dante did something on your wedding night, and I also saw you puking a few times. You became pallid a month after the incident. I had a feeling, but I assumed I would be the first to learn about your pregnancy. I had to threaten Emily in order to coerce her into telling me. Don’t worry, Dante will not track you down. He is a complete disaster at the moment. He has been on the lookout for you as well. Lola, you’ve succeeded in making him cry for the first time in his life. But, you are wrong, Dante doesn’t love Candice, he loves you.”

It made me sad to learn that Dante had wept because of me. How will he react when he discovers that I fled with his children? Is he going to sue me? Will our friendship come to an end? Even though it aches, I’m no longer concerned about his love. Even if it hurts, will he accept my children if he discovers that we produced souls that night? He is free to reject me. I couldn’t care less, but his rejecting my children would be like a sword piercing through my heart. He had already told me that we could not work, which I accepted.

The divorce decree, I didn’t submit it.

“I’m simply not interested in drama in my life, mama. I need to submit our divorce papers so that we can finally let go.” I opened the drawer to retrieve the papers.

“You are not going to do such a thing! Please hand over the divorce papers to me. I am not going to coerce you into being with him. That is all up to you. However, if you sign these documents and give birth to your children, what will you name them? Do you want people to think you have children outside of marriage? Will a man easily accept you with three children? It’s three, not two, Lola. You are not divorcing Dante; instead, you will give his surname to your children. Following that, if you desire a divorce, you may proceed. You are a married woman who did not become pregnant out of wedlock. She snatched up the divorce papers. Now, I noticed you were living by yourself, which is not safe. The lady will look after you. I’ll be dropping by once a week to see how you’re doing. Not to worry; no one knows where I am. Additionally, I will ensure that yours is not traceable. Dante is my son, but he needs to grow up. Come with me; I prepared breakfast prior to stepping on you while dreaming about Dante.”

My cheeks turned crimson with embarrassment. I’m grateful I didn’t touch myself. She had only just heard his name. Can I truly rely on Dante’s mother when it comes to the divorce papers? As we passed the fireplace, she tossed the divorce papers into the flames.

“There isn’t going to be a divorce.” I stood there in shock, staring at her. “Do you have any problems with this plan?” I shook my head, and Martha continued, “Good!” As we walked, it seemed as if the house belonged to her. The woman she hired was preoccupied with bringing baby items into the house.

“Can you tell me what time it is?”

She replied, looking at her wristwatch, and said, “3:00 PM.” I have never slept so soundly in my entire life. I followed her up. I was in awe as she opened the door. The children’s room was completed and painted, but I could still smell the faint smell of paint. It was just stunning.

“Thus, Evelyn would be in charge of the house, while Ruth would be in charge of your cooking. I’m returning tomorrow to avoid raising suspicions.”

Even though she seemed adamant when I looked at her, I wondered whether there was still hope for Dante and me. He told me we couldn’t be together, and it hurts knowing that all the promises were for nothing, that it was just a one-sided love.

Did she really mean it? Is he on the lookout for me as a friend or as a wife?